Midnight
by Brightfire15
Summary: Sequel to Sunset. AU of New Moon. With the departure of Bella, Edward finds himself in a new world of pain and secrets when his friendship with Janessa Black is strained and later goes to the Volturi to stop a mistake from taking place. Read and review!
1. Eighteenth Birthday

Midnight

Disclaimer: I do not own _Twilight_

My name is Edward Anthony Swan. Until I came to Forks, my life was ordinary and an open book. But then I met _her, _Isabella Marie Cullen, the immortal woman who would forever change my world.

She and her family were vampires. I'd figured it out after she'd saved my life and I'd done some reading on some old legends. Our relationship had been going almost perfectly until I'd almost been killed by James, a nomad vampire.

Since then, James's mate had been after me and it'd taken weeks before Bella even let me out of her sight. Not that I minded being with my girlfriend more often. I even enjoyed her nocturnal visits before I went to sleep.

Her family was absolutely wonderful. Carlisle and Esme were the parents I'd always wanted, Emmet and Jasper were like my brothers and Alice and Rosalie were the sisters I never had. And Bella was the one I wanted to spend forever with.

At that moment, it'd been several months since my near-death experience. And I was waking up with a start from my nightmare. I breathed hard and ran my hands through my hair and over the circular scar on my shoulder—it told a painful story.

Carlisle had once told me that after watching James's video of me and seeing how I'd never once begged James to stop what he was doing or cried out in pain from my wounds, he'd gained great admiration of my strength.

At that moment, I was remembering Phoenix and how James had nearly killed me and the Cullens and my own personal fears of what would happen if Bella still refused to change me. I wanted to be like her, a vampire, so I could stay with her forever. But she kept refusing, because she wanted me to be human and not live her kind of life—something else that really frustrated me. I didn't care what kind of life I had as long it was with her.

I didn't have time to think about that as Charlie entered the room with two presents. It was my eighteenth birthday today—something else I hated. I disliked being celebrated and I disliked getting presents because people already did enough for me. I didn't need more. But I was always polite about it, regardless.

"Happy birthday," said Charlie.

"I thought we agreed no presents," I said.

"Well, the one from me's not wrapped, so it doesn't count."

I smiled as I took the camera from him. "That's actually great, thanks Dad."

"The camera goes with this one," said Charlie. "It's from your mom. We coordinated. Well, she coordinated me." I yanked off the wrapping paper to find a handsome photo album. "It's to put pictures in for from senior year." He sighed. "Senior year," he repeated. "How'd you get so old so fast?"

"I didn't. It's not _that _old," I protested.

"I don't know. Is that a grey hair?" he teased.

I swatted his hand away. "No, no way," I said. I already had bad dreams about aging. I didn't need Charlie reminding me that I was aging and would therefore be physically older than Bella, who was forever at the age of seventeen. But I checked the mirror just to be sure. There was no grey hair. I glared at Charlie, who just laughed and left the room saying, "Happy birthday."

I let out a small laugh myself before getting dressed, grabbing some breakfast and heading out to Forks High. On the radio was yet another report of a missing, probably dead person. The police were saying it was an animal. I was a little worried. The last time "an animal" had attacked, it'd been nomad vampires. But I let it slide as I pulled into the parking lot and found my friends.

"Hey, Edward," said Angela. "Today's the big day."

I looked confused until Jessica said, "_Romeo and Juliet _essay due."

"Oh, yeah," I said.

"Wherefore art thou, Edward?" said Lauren.

We all laughed and then I pulled out my camera. "Hey, let me take a picture. My mom wants some photos of my senior year."

They all agreed and after they grouped together, I took the photo. Then Lauren's eyes fell across the parking lot. "Oh, good, Cullen's here."

I looked and saw one of the Cullens' cars pull in and then my Greek goddess came out. My friends took that as a cue to leave, knowing I'd be on Cloud Nine since Bella was here. She looked beautiful, as always, and she was smiling.

"Happy birthday," she said, as I pulled her into my arms.

I groaned. "Don't remind me."

Bella looked amused. "Edward, your birth's definitely something to celebrate."

"Yeah, but my _aging _isn't."

She raised an eyebrow. "Your aging?" she said, chuckling. "I think eighteen's a little young to start worrying about that."

"It's one year older than you."

"No it isn't. I'm one hundred and nine."

"Well, maybe I shouldn't be dating such an old woman," I teased. "It's gross. I should be _thoroughly _repulsed."

Bella just laughed before we kissed. Eventually, we stopped as we both sighed and the warning bell rang.

"We have to go to class," I said.

"Okay," said Bella. "But wait a second. Someone wants you."

"Edward!"

I looked and saw my old childhood friend, Janessa Black. "Janessa," I said.

Bella bit her lip and then began to pull away. "I'll leave you to talk."

I turned to Janessa, who was smiling and looking perfectly fit and strong and had a nice figure. She also looked lovely with her black hair, dark eyes and tanned skin. She'd grown into a bit of a tomboy, but I didn't mind in the slightest.

"Well, look at you. You know anabolic steroids are bad for you," I said, jokingly.

She laughed. "Well, I'm just filling out, Edward. You know it wouldn't seem so drastic if we hung out more."

"You should switch schools. You can come hang out with the palefaces."

"I'm all right. I prefer the rez school's exclusivity. This place takes in any old riffraff."

"I see. Then why are you slumming it?" I asked.

"I was just buying a part for the Rabbit. You should really come take a ride when it's done," said Janessa.

"Is it fast?"

"Uh…it's decent."

We both laughed.

"I'm kidding."

"Good. Hey, happy birthday. Your dad told my dad, so he told me." She took something out of her pocket. "I saw this, the other day and thought of you." It was dream catcher made of wood and feathers. "It catches bad dreams."

"It's kind of perfect," I said. "Thanks."

"No problem," she said. "Well, I'll be seeing you."

"See you later."

She hugged me and then we let go. Janessa then left the parking lot and I entered the school with my girlfriend.

"So, how come Janessa Black gets to give you a gift and I don't?" she asked.

"Because I have nothing to give back to you," I said.

"Edward, you give me everything just by breathing."

I exhaled and made her smile. "See? Thank you. That's all I want."

"Edward!" said Alice.

"Eddie!" said Emmet.

The two leapt over a railing and hugged me.

"Happy birthday!" Alice sang.

"Shh!" I said. "And don't call me Eddie, _please_."

They both laughed and handed me a darkly wrapped gift.

"I thought I said no presents," I said.

"I've already seen you open it and guess what, you _love _it!" said Alice. "You're going to wear it tonight, our place."

"What?" I asked, looking at the three vampires.

"We're celebrating your birthday at our place tonight," said Emmet. "Alice has already gone and done the whole shebang on this. So, are you coming?"

I hesitated, but then Alice said, "Come on. Please? It'll be fun."

I sighed. "Alright, you win."

Alice squealed and high-fived Emmet.

"Great, we'll see you at seven," said Emmet.

I pressed my gift into Bella's chest as Alice went off with Jasper and Emmet took off with Rosalie, their husband and wife. Bella just looked amused. "You can't trust vampires. Trust me," she said, as I sighed in exasperation.

During English, we watched _Romeo and Juliet_. I'd always had a small liking of that story, but it wasn't enough that I was crying my green eyes out like Jessica, Angela, Mike, and Eric were. When we were sure we wouldn't be overheard, Bella and I started talking.

"What's the matter with you today? Why don't you want to celebrate?" she whispered.

"I _hate _being celebrated," I whispered back.

"There are worse tragedies. Look at Juliet. She killed herself just to be with her true love."

"Yeah, I guess."

"I do envy her one thing, though."

"What? Romeo's practically perfect if you like that obviously beautiful kind of thing."

Bella looked amused. "Not the guy," she said. "The suicide."

I raised a questioning eyebrow.

"It's nearly impossible for some people. For humans, a little poison, a dagger to the heart. There are so many different options."

I sighed. Sometimes I forgot that she sometimes wanted her mortality back. Sure, a lot of the myths about her kind were just that, myths, but wasn't there more than one way to kill a vampire? "Why would you say that?" I asked.

"Because I had to consider it once," she murmured. Her eyes closed and I knew what she was thinking of—James, Victoria, and my being close to death. "I didn't know if I'd get to you in time. I had to come up with some kind of plan."

I took her hand in mine and gently rubbed it with my thumb. She still blamed herself for what happened, even though no one blamed her. "Hey, it's fine. I'm okay now. It's all right," I murmured. "It's okay."

She sighed as a tear escaped her eye—another one of her gifts. Unlike other vampires, she could shed tears. "I know," she said.

"Just out of curiosity, what _was _the plan?" I asked.

"That I'd go to Italy and provoke the Volturi."

I was confused. "The what?"

"The Volturi," she repeated.

Before I could question her further, Mr. Berty asked her to repeat the last few lines of the film to see if we'd been paying attention. All eyes of the class were upon us, making me feel uncomfortable, but Bella remained calm and recited the last few lines perfectly. This seemed to impress the teacher as class resumed afterward.

Not daring to talk, Bella then passed me a note.

_I'll explain about the Volturi later tonight at the house before the party, I promise._

I just nodded and accepted it.

Later, Charlie let me go to the Cullens for my birthday and I found myself in Bella's room dressed in a fine suit. Bella was wearing a green dress with a black jacket. She looked simply perfect as she walked into my open arms.

"You look handsome," she said.

"And you look beautiful," I said, as I kissed her.

She smiled a little. "Thank you."

"So, who're the Volturi?" I asked.

Bella sighed and took me to Carlisle's study where a huge painting was hung on the wall. "The Volturi are a very old, very powerful family. They're at least 3,000 years old. I guess they're the closest thing to royalty my world has."

I frowned as I recognized one of the vampires. "Is that _Carlisle_?"

"Yeah," said Bella. "He lived with them for a few decades. He described them as very refined. No respect for human life, of course, but a respect for the arts and the sciences at least. And the law. Above all the law."

I raised an eyebrow. "Vampires have laws?"

"Not very many. And only one that's regularly enforced."

"Let me guess," I sighed. "You're not supposed to reveal yourselves to humans."

"Something like that," said Bella. "And we don't make spectacles of ourselves and we don't kill conspicuously. Unless of course, we _want_ to die."

I sighed in exasperation and tried to get that image out of my head. "You know, you've _really _got to stop talking about that kind of stuff, Bella. I can't even _think _about someone hurting you."

"Edward, don't worry. The only thing that can hurt me is you. And I don't have anything else to be afraid of."

"That's not true."

"What?" she said. Then she caught on. "Victoria? She'll come for me one day. Alice will see when she decides and we'll be ready."

"I could protect you. If you change me," I pointed out.

Bella just leaned into my embrace. "Edward, you already _do _protect me. You're my only reason to stay alive…if that's what I am." Then she looked serious. "But it's _my_ job to protect _you_."

I sighed. Heaven, this girl was a stubborn piece of a work.

"It's my job to protect you from everyone _except_ my sister," she said.

I looked and saw Alice bouncing in saying, "It's time! It's time, it's time, it's time!" I mentally groaned and shot a look at Bella that said, _"You just really hate me, don't you?_" as I was pulled downstairs.

Candles were everywhere, there were presents, and the Cullens were all decked out in fine formal clothes. Carlisle was looking at me sympathetically. "I'm sorry about all this. We tried to rein Alice in," he said.

"As if that were even possible," said Esme, as she hugged me. "Happy birthday, Edward."

"Thanks."

There was the snap of a camera. I looked and saw that Alice had my camera. "I found it in your bag. Do you mind?"

I bit back a laugh and shook my head. The little pixie drove me nuts sometimes, but she was the little sister I never had. I could hear Emmet teasing Bella. "Dating an older man," he said. "Not bad, little sis." Then Bella sighed in exasperation as I bit back a laugh. I tapped Emmet on the shoulder.

"Don't tease her today, please?" I asked.

"Okay, it's your b-day," said Emmet.

Bella looked at me in gratitude as I pulled her into my arms. Alice kept taking pictures and I was beginning to enjoy myself. I kept opening presents and thanking the person who'd given it to me. Everything was going fine until I got a paper cut on Esme and Carlisle's present.

Everything happened so fast at that point it was like a blur. My blood made Jasper go berserk and nearly attack me. Nearly everyone had to restrain him and I somehow ended up with an even bigger cut on my arm. Carlisle took control of the situation. He had everyone leave while he tended to me. I could tell Bella didn't want to, but she obeyed.

"Hey, Jasper!" I said, before they left. "It's all right. I'm not mad. It's okay."

Jasper didn't say anything, but his eyes gave him away as he was led out of the room and Carlisle took me to his office to be stitched up. My jacket was off and my shirt sleeve was rolled up. I knew it wasn't my fault, but felt guilty about what happened.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I never wanted this."

"It's not your fault," said Carlisle. "Jasper hasn't been away from human blood as long as the rest of us. It's still difficult for him."

I sighed. "Carlisle, how do you do it?"

"Years and years of practice," he replied.

"Did you ever think of just doing it the easy way?"

"No. I knew who I wanted to be. I knew I wanted to help people. It brings me happiness, even if I am condemned regardless."

"Condemned?" I repeated. "Like Tartarus?"

Carlisle was silent, but his face gave him away.

"Carlisle, you couldn't be condemned. You couldn't. It's impossible."

He smiled. "Thank you, Edward. You've always been very gracious about us."

It was then that I caught on to the real reason Bella wouldn't change me. She thought I'd be losing my soul if I became a part of her lifestyle. "So, that's it, then? That's why she won't change me?"

"Imagine the situation in reverse. Hmm," said Carlisle, as he wrapped up his work. If you believed as Bella does, could you take away her soul?"

I didn't answer him as I rolled down my sleeve and put my jacket back on. Bella then entered the room, looking upset. "It's late. Charlie wants you home now. Come on, I'll drive you back."

I followed her out to my truck and we drove in silence. The silence wasn't broken until we arrived at my house. "You can't protect me from everything. Sooner or later; something is going to separate us. It's going to be an accident or an illness or old age, as long as I'm human. And the only solution is to change me."

Bella shook her head. "That's not a solution. It's a _tragedy_."

"You're not going to want me when I look like a grandfather."

She didn't respond at first. She just got out of the car and then quickly opened my door. "Edward, do you not understand my feelings for you at all?"

"Carlisle told me how you feel about your soul," I said, after a brief moment. "I don't believe that. So don't worry about mine."

She sighed. "You should go inside."

I sighed again as we walked a little ways until I stopped. "It's still my birthday. So, can I ask one thing?"

"Anything," she said.

"Kiss me."

She nodded and then I cupped her face and kissed her. I inhaled sharply. Her touch still sent electric shots through my body—in a good way. When we broke apart, I whispered, "I love you."

"I love you too," she said. "Goodnight, Edward."


	2. Losing True Love

Losing True Love

Charlie was already asleep when I went inside, so I just went to my room and printed off the photos in my camera. The one Alice had taken of me and Bella holding each other was my favorite. But even as I held it and gazed at her perfection, I still felt inferior to her, no matter what she said to me. Why couldn't she see that I didn't care what happened to me as long as we could be together?

I sighed for the millionth time that day as I changed into my pajamas and went to sleep. The next day, none of the Cullens were at school and that worried me. When I got the chance, I drove down to Bella's place. I knew something was wrong, but I didn't know what. I found Bella waiting for me in her front yard. She looked anything but happy, as though she was struggling with something.

"Hey," I said. "You okay?"

"Just come take a walk with me," she said.

I didn't know what was going on, but I knew it wasn't anything good as we walked through the forest and then stopped at a big tree. Bella still had her back turned to me, but after a moment, she turned around.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"We have to leave Forks." she said.

"Why?" I asked, shocked.

"Carlisle supposed to be ten years older than he looks. People are starting to notice."

"Okay," I sighed. "I've got to come up with something to say to Charlie." Then I noticed her silence and how upset she looked. A sinking feeling entered the pit of my stomach. "When you say 'we'…"

"I mean my family and myself."

I inhaled sharply. "Bella, what happened with Jasper, it was nothing. I—"

"Yeah, you're right. It _was_ nothing," she interrupted. "Nothing but what I always expected to happen and _nothing_ compared to what _could've_ happened. You just don't belong in my world, Edward."

I felt a little angry and upset. "I belong with you."

"No, you don't," she said, firmly. "And I'm not good for you."

"Don't be stupid. You're the best part of my life!" I argued. My body began to shake. "If this is about my soul, then take it! I don't want it! I want _you_."

She didn't respond, even when I cupped her face. Eventually, she looked at me and feelings of desperation crept into my heart.

"You promised me," I said, my voice cracking. "You promised me…in Phoenix that you would stay."

"As long as it was best for you," she said.

"And what, now it isn't? Bella, I'm coming with you!"

"Edward, please, just stop it!" She closed her eyes for a moment, and when she opened them, the beautiful topaz gaze was cold and empty. "Edward, I don't want you to come with us," she said.

My heart skipped a beat and I looked at her, shocked. "What? You…you don't want me?"

"No."

"Well, then this changes things," I said, trying to ignore how broken I felt.

"I'm sorry I let this go on so long," she whispered.

"Don't do this," I begged. "Please, don't do this."

"You're not good for me."

My heart was shattering. How could she do this? How could she be like this? _I wasn't good enough for her? _Had our entire relationship meant nothing to her? My knees were starting to buckle and I felt weak.

"One more thing, promise me you won't do anything reckless. I'm speaking of Charlie. He needs you. Stay safe…for him. And in return, I'll give you my word that you'll never see me again. I won't come back. This will be the last time you'll ever see me. Your life will carry on as though I never existed. Forget that I even existed."

I couldn't tell if she was going to cry or not, but I knew that tears were stinging _my _eyes and I was fighting them back before they blurred my vision. She didn't want me. I couldn't believe it. "Please, don't."

She began stepping back

"Wait!" I croaked. I reached out for her and took her into my arms before I kissed her once more. After a moment, she broke it off and said, "Good-bye, Edward," before she disappeared without looking back.

I didn't even think. I just reacted. "Bella! Bella! BELLA!" I shouted as I ran. But she was nowhere to be found. She was gone. My entire world had crashed down around me. The tears then escaped my eyes as I crumbled to the ground and passed out, trying to mend my shattered heart.

Eventually, I felt something nudging me. I opened my eyes to see that it was nightfall and Janessa was kneeling beside me looking worried.

"Janessa?" I said.

"Edward," she said, sounding relieved. "Thank heaven you're okay. You've had us all worried sick. Come on, stand up."

She helped me to stand and it was then that I wrapped my arms around her and tried not to cry. Janessa just returned the embrace and rubbed circles up and down my back. She didn't say anything, as if she knew what had happened. When we let go, she helped me get home where Charlie and a bunch of other cops were waiting.

"Edward!" he said. He looked worried. I couldn't blame him. I wanted to apologize for that, but at that moment, I felt sick, heartbroken and dead inside.

"He was passed out in the woods. Physically, he's fine," said Janessa.

"Edward, are you really all right? What happened?" he asked me.

I shook my head. "I'm sorry I worried you. I didn't mean to. She's gone, Dad," I said, as my voice cracked. "Bella's left. I'm never going to see her again."

"Oh, Edward…"

He hugged me and I tried to fight back the sobs that entered my throat. I was still finding it hard to believe. She was gone. My Bella, my only love, was _gone_. What on earth was I going to do without her? After a cup of hot chocolate and a long talk with Charlie, I went to bed, but I couldn't even sleep well that night or any other night.

The following week saw me absent from Forks High as I tried to regain control over my emotions and my pain. I spent most of the time in my room working on school or trying not to lose it. I came down to eat and use the restroom, but otherwise, I was in my room, feeling numb and dead inside. After a week, I grabbed my things and prepared to go back to school. I made breakfast and greeted my dad when he came in the kitchen.

"Hey, Dad," I said.

"Morning, son," He looked at me with concern. "What're your plans for today?"

"I'm heading back to school. I'm going to keep myself busy. It's all I can do."

Charlie nodded sympathetically and put a hand on my shoulder. "I know it hurts badly right now. But it'll get easier, Edward. And just remember that if you need anything, I'm here for you."

I nodded. "Thanks, Dad."

After breakfast, I drove off back to Forks High. I never would've gone back in the first place if I knew I couldn't mess up my grades or worry my parents further. I had to keep busy and not think about her.

When I went back, everyone knew that the Cullens had left and it was obvious that Bella and I were no longer a couple. My friends were sympathetic and patient with me. Because they could see it was still a sensitive subject, no one said anything bad about Bella or went into our break up very much, for which I was grateful.

Four very long months later, I was keeping myself busy and trying not to think about Bella and how much I missed her. I wrote to Alice and Emmet, but my e-mails didn't always get through. I kept working on my schoolwork, I faked smiles when I hung out with my friends, and I felt dead inside. I couldn't even write more music.

I forced myself to eat and talk. At night, I had nightmares about and often woke up screaming. How I managed to not wake up Charlie, I'll never know. During the worst nights, I got next to no sleep because I couldn't stop thinking about _her_. Whenever I was alone, I felt depressed and in pain. I wanted her back so badly, it was killing me.

I found out when I had an adrenaline rush, I saw her and I heard her again. So, I picked some motorbikes from the junkyard and decided to fix them up. I couldn't afford to pay a mechanic, so I decided to visit Janessa. Before leaving, I was in my room finishing an e-mail. I was still debating as to whether or not to send it as I looked it over.

_Dear Alice and Emmet,_

_It's been four months since you guys moved and I've missed you like crazy since then. Carlisle, Esme, Jasper, you two, even Rosalie and I've missed Bella even more. Don't tell Bella, but it feels like a huge hole's been punched through my chest since she left. Everywhere I go, I remember how it used to be when she and the rest of you were here._

_I've been trying to keep myself busy with work, but it feels so empty without her. I can't do my music; and I don't even sleep well anymore because she's not there. I just feel like a zombie. The absence of her is everywhere I look. When I'm alone, it gets even worse. I've found out that when I have an adrenaline rush, I see her face and hear her voice. It's nuts, but what else can I do to see her again? _

_I've saved some bikes from the junkyard. I'm going to try and get them fixed up with a friend of mine. Again, please don't tell her about any of this. No one but you even knows how bad this feels and I'd prefer to keep it that way. And if she knew about the motorbikes, she'd probably skin me alive. I'll e-mail again later. _

—_Edward. _


	3. Motorcycles

Motorcycles

I sighed, saved the e-mail, and switched off my computer before heading down to work on the bikes. I couldn't send it, even if it did get through. What if Bella read it and found out? I wanted her back, but not because of guilt. And besides, she didn't want me. I pushed it aside as I headed out. I'd told Charlie I was going over to Janessa's—(minus the motorbikes part)—and he'd liked the idea. I drove over and met with Janessa at her place.

"Edward! Where the heck have you been?" She ran into my arms and I spun her around in a tight embrace. I was laughing for real when we let go. "It's really great to see you, buddy. What're you doing here?"

"I, uh, I brought you something." I lifted up the tarps and revealed the two bikes. This made her look amused.

"Wow, scrap metal. You shouldn't have."

"Yeah, I know. I saved them from the junkyard." I bit my lip as I tried to explain what I wanted. "I can't afford to pay a mechanic, but then I remembered I have a good mechanic friend to help me, and then it wouldn't be so bad trying to repair them."

"So, I'm your mechanic friend. Okay. Since when are you into motorcycles?" she asked.

"Since now," I said, trying not to mention the real reason I was into them. She seemed to hesitate, so I added, "Look, I get it if you think it's stupid and reckless."

"Yeah, even for a guy, motorcycles are _completely _stupid and reckless." But then she smiled. "So, when do we start?"

"Uh," I said, caught off-guard. "Right now."

She chuckled and then reached for them. "Okay, then let's get to work."

I was about to help her, but then she took one out of the truck with her bare hands as easily as she would carry a book. I was stunned. "Wow," I said. "You're stronger than you look. You're sixteen, it shouldn't even be possible."

"Hey, never poke at a girl's age," she scolded. "Besides, age is just a number. And what are you, forty, now?"

I decided not to dignify that with a response as I got the second bike out and we began working that day. Halfway through the work, Janessa said, "So, if we're going to do this every day, and I hope that we are. We're going to have find homework in here sometime. I don't want my dad thinking you're a bad influence on me."

I looked up from my work and raised an eyebrow. "Me? Influence _you_? Please," I said. "Just because I'm older and a guy does not mean that I'm the influencer and you're the influencee."

She laughed. "No, actually, I was thinking that my knowledge base actually makes me older and more influential than you, because of your general paleness and lack of know-how and such."

"I convinced you to build two-wheeled death machines with me. Doesn't that make _you _kind of young and naïve?"

"Maybe," said Janessa. "You do realize you're just proving my point."

I burst out laughing. "Remind again how this conversation started?"

Before she could reply, the door opened.

"Yo, Janessa; are you in there?"

I was about to duck, but Janessa put a hand on my shoulder.

"Relax, it's just my boys."

"Hey, Jan," said a guy.

"Hey guys, this is Edward Swan," said Janessa. "Edward, this is Quil and Embry."

"Hi," I said.

"I'm Quil Atera," he said. "So, the bike building story is true."

"Oh, yeah, I taught her everything she knows," I said.

"What about the part where you're her boyfriend?" he asked.

My head shot up. Did I hear him right? I was Janessa's _boyfriend_? Since when were Janessa and I anything but just friends? "Uh, we're just friends, you know." I shot a look at Janessa, who seemed both embarrassed and angry.

Embry laughed. "Ooh, burn!"

"Actually, remember, I said he's a boy _and_ a friend," said Janessa, stiffly.

"Embry, do you remember her making that distinction?" asked Quil.

"Nope," said Embry, looking amused.

"So, you guys have girlfriends, that's awesome," I said, determined not to let them pick on or tease Janessa.

Janessa laughed and so did Embry at my little joke. "Yeah, right. Quil's actually taking his _cousin_ to prom," she said.

"Yeah, that's still a riot," said Quil, sarcastically. "You want funny, Black? I'll give you funny."

With that, the two of them started playfully wrestling each other. I would've broken it up, but I knew they weren't hurting each other and—plus, it _was_ kind of funny to watch them be like that.

"So, five bucks on Quil?" asked Embry, looking at me.

"You're on."

And as it turned out, I won the bet and tried not to smile when Embry handed me the five dollars.

As the weeks passed, I found that it wasn't so bad hanging out with Janessa. She didn't heal the hole in my chest, but she made the pain a lot easier to bear and I felt a little more alive as we talked, joked, worked and ate pizza during breaks. Without my permission, word of what Janessa and I were doing made its way through Forks. Charlie wasn't that pleased, but he let it go, especially when he saw how much work we'd put into the bikes.

The other teens at Forks High began to whisper among themselves that I was Janessa's boyfriend and she was my girlfriend. I told my friends that it wasn't true and thankfully, the rumors ceased within a couple of days. But I had to admit there was _some _truth to it. Janessa _was _making me a little happier, but even she couldn't take the pain away or the dreams. The following night when I woke up, almost yelling, I tried to calm myself down.

I looked at Janessa's dream catcher which I kept on my bed post. _I thought your gift was starting to work, Jan, _I thought. _I guess it doesn't. _

Charlie seemed happy that I was hanging out with Janessa. He could see it was taking my mind off Bella and encouraged me to see her as something more than a friend. I couldn't respond to that. My heart wouldn't let go of Bella yet and it probably wouldn't—not ever, not in a million years. When the bikes were finished, I picked up Janessa to test drive them. She seemed quiet as we drove until I finally asked her what was on her mind.

"If I told you I couldn't have fixed those bikes, what would you have said?" she asked.

"If you doubt your work, you don't need to. I know it'll be fine."

"No, I'm not doubting my skill," said Janessa, smiling. But then her smile faded. "It's just that, maybe if I was smart, I would've dragged out the rebuild a bit."

I sighed. "Listen, if you'd told me you couldn't have fixed those bikes, I would've said, 'that's really too bad. We'll have to find something else to do." I wasn't lying to her. It was the honest truth. This seemed to please her and she chuckled. Then I saw some of the other Reservation boys on a cliff wrestling or something. "Is that Sam Uley?" I asked.

"Yeah, him and his cult," said Janessa.

When I saw Paul get pushed off the cliff, I couldn't believe my eyes. I pulled over and got out of the car. Janessa followed me, laughing. I looked at her and my eyes asked what could possibly be so funny.

"They're not really fighting, Edward," she said. "They're cliff diving. It's as scary as heck, but a total rush."

"A rush?" I repeated, as Quil also jumped.

"Most of us prefer jumping lower down," said Janessa. "We leave the showing off to Sam and his disciples. I've never done it, though. I've never liked heights that much and my dad said he'd skin me alive if he ever caught me doing it."

I shook my head. "Do you have some kind of a problem with him or something? You seem to be hacked off at him."

She sighed. "I don't know. Lately, they've been acting like they run this place. Embry used to call them hall monitors on steroids before he joined up with them."

"Jeez," I said, noticing his muscles. "What the heck happened to him?"

"Like I said, I don't know. He just missed some school and started following Sam around like a lost puppy. The same thing happened with Paul and Jared. Sam keeps giving me this look like he's expecting it to happen to me or something. And it's starting to scare me, Edward. It really is."

She seemed upset, so I held her and she returned my embrace. I stroked her hair as she cried for a moment. Then she let go and wiped her eyes.

"You should just avoid him."

"I try. But it's like he's everywhere. All I know is, something's going on and it involves Sam. I just don't know what it is."

I sighed. "Okay, Jan, listen to me. If he keeps bothering you and you need to talk, just call me and I'll listen. Or come get me, Charlie or your dad, okay? You're my best friend. I won't let anything happen to you."

"I know," she said. Then she smiled. "Come on, slowpoke. We've got bikes to test."

I smiled back and we continued on.

We eventually arrived at our destination, unloaded the bikes and then practiced on how to use the controls. I knew a fair bit, having done my reading when I was bored, but I wasn't sure how much Janessa knew. But it turned out, she was more experienced than I was and kept making sure I knew what I was doing. I told her I'd be fine and to go on ahead before I'd catch up with her. She hesitated, but then agreed before taking off.

I was about to slowly release the clutch when I heard Bella's voice and saw her, like a ghost. "_Edward,_" she said. "_Stop_."

I almost sped up before I managed to grab the break. I'd seen her. I'd _heard _her. "I'm sorry, Bella," I whispered. "If this is what it takes to bring you back, then so be it." And with that, I sped up and continued driving on the path.

I saw her three more times before I lost control of the bike and crashed. The bike was fine, but I wasn't sure about myself. Slowly, I picked myself up as I heard a bike approach and saw Janessa.

"I leave you for _two minutes_ and look at you!" she muttered. "Edward, you said you knew what you were doing. Are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"No. I'm not. I want to go again," I said, before mentally slapping myself. I must've sounded so stupid to her.

"No, I don't think you should," said Janessa. "No more bikes, at least not today, anyway." She blinked and then her eyes widened. "Oh, man your head."

I raised my hand up and winced as my cut stung. "Ow," I said. "I'm sorry."

"You're apologizing for bleeding?" she said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I guess I am."

She shook her head at me. "You're a nut, you know that? It's just blood, Edward. It's no big deal." She took out a handkerchief and pressed it against my injury before I could protest and she held it there until the bleeding stopped and then wiped the remains of the blood off my skin.

"Thanks," I said. It was then that I noticed how nice she looked in the late afternoon sunlight. How would I describe it?

"What're you staring at?" she asked.

"Nothing. It's just…you look lovely."

She blushed. "Lovely?" she repeated. "Thank you. Just one question."

"Shoot."

"How hard did you hit your head?"

I chuckled before I said, "Come on, let's go."

We packed up the bikes and then I dropped them and Janessa off at her place. I agreed to wait a while before trying them again and she asked, "Do you want to go to the movies tomorrow night? Not as a date, but just as friends. You could bring your others friends from your school if you want."

"Yeah, sure," I said. "What movie did you want to see?"

"That new action film," she said.

I nodded. "Okay, I'll talk to my friends tomorrow and call you."

She looked pleased and nodded before we parted and when lunch came the next day, I sat down with my friends.

"Hey," said Angela. "I heard you tested the bikes yesterday. How'd it go?"

"It was bad. I sort of crashed into a rock," I admitted.

Mike and Tyler laughed before Jessica and Lauren swatted them.

"So, what's going on with you and Miss Black?" asked Eric, teasingly.

I rolled my eyes. "For the last time, Eric, she's not my girlfriend. She's just a _friend_. And for your information, _Janessa_ wants to go see the new action film tonight with me and invited you guys to come along with us."

That managed to shut him up.

"I'd love to go hang out, but my dad wants me to spend more time on my homework tonight," said Lauren.

"And my mom thinks action films give me nightmares," said Tyler.

"I'll go," said Angela. "Janessa sounds like fun."

"I'll go," said Eric. "I've been wanting to catch that flick."

"Ditto," said Mike.

Jessica looked annoyed, but then nodded.

"Okay, guys, thanks. Come to the theater around six."

They nodded and I changed the subject.

Unfortunately, when we arrived at the theater, I got a call on my cell. Both Mike and Angela came down with the stomach flu and Eric was staying with them. Jessica had come, but she looked uncomfortable. I noticed and decided to do something.

"Hey, Jess," I said, gently. "Listen, if you don't want to do this, you don't have to. I won't be offended if you want to leave."

She sighed and looked relieved. "Thanks, Edward. I'm sorry. I should've told you. I just didn't want to hurt your feelings."

"You didn't," I assured her. "It's not a big deal. I can take you home if you want."

"No, it's okay. My mom's coming. She'll take me." She hugged me. "Thanks for being such a sweet gentleman."

I smiled and then a car honked and she disappeared.

"Just us, huh?" said Janessa, as she stood behind me. She'd been purchasing our tickets and was looking amused.

"Yep."

She smiled. "Great." She chuckled in Jessica's direction. "What a marshmallow. You should hold out for someone with a stronger stomach."

I chuckled as I took my ticket and we went inside. We watched the movie and it wasn't my favorite film, but I stuck through it because it was what Janessa wanted. When the movie was over, we were laughing about how everyone had more or less bailed on us. It was fun, but when Janessa's hand almost slid into mine, I pulled away.

"What, you can't hold my hand?" she asked.

"No, of course I can," I said, shaking my head. "I just think it means something a little different to you. So…"

Janessa sighed. "Okay, so tell me something, okay? You like me, right?"

"Yeah, of course I do."

"And you think I'm lovely?"

I nodded. But then I realized what was happening. I wasn't ready for this. It was too soon and I knew I wouldn't be fair to her if I did what she wanted. I closed my eyes. "Janessa, please, don't do this." I sighed as I sat down on the stairs.

"Why?" she demanded.

I bit my lip and tried to find a way to talk to her without being too harsh. "Because you're about to ruin everything," I murmured. "And I need you."

"Well, I've got loads of time," she said. "I'm not going to give up."

"And, I don't want you to. But it's just because I don't want you to go anywhere. And that's really selfish of me. I can't do that to you." I sighed. "I like being with you, a lot, Janessa. But I'm not some car that you can fix up. I'm never going to run right and that's not fair to you."

"It's because of _her_, right?"

I didn't reply. I just turned away as she sat next to me. "Look, I know what she did to you. But Edward, I would _never_ ever do that. I won't ever hurt you, I promise. I won't let you down. You can count on me."

I was silent and just sighed as we held each other close and then stood up and left the movie theater. Everything was fine until Janessa got mad at some guy for something petty. I had to grab onto her to stop her from attacking him before I realized how hot she was feeling.

"Jan, are you okay? Your skin's on fire, like you've got a fever," I asked, frowning.

She inhaled sharply and looked worried. "I don't know what's happening to me. Please, just take me home. Please."

"Okay, okay," I said, soothingly, as I rubbed her hand. "I'll take you home. It's okay."

She didn't say a word as we drove—even when I talked to her. When I dropped her off at her house, she ran inside. I didn't know what was going on, but I hoped she'd be okay, whatever happened.

Days passed.

Billy said Janessa was sick and refused to let me see her. I left numerous messages and asked her to call me back, but she never picked up the phone or returned my calls. I was getting worried. Something was going on that she wasn't telling me about and I had feeling it involved Sam.

A few days later, it was pouring rain, which meant it was time for my dad's favorite sport. Charlie and Harry were going fishing. I barely listened to them as I hung up the phone, having left yet another message for Janessa. After hanging up, Charlie looked at me with concern and sighed.

"Look, I don't have to go fishing today."

"Yes, you do," said Harry.

"Yeah, he's right, Dad. What're you waiting for? Go. Just be careful, okay?"

"Always am," said Charlie.

Harry Clearwater smiled. "Those bears won't get the drop on me, Edward. My kung-fu's strong."

I just smiled and nodded. The minute they left, I got in my truck and drove over to Janessa's. I was sick of waiting and feeling worried. I had to know if she was alright and I had to know what was going on.

When I arrived, I saw her walking in the rain wearing sandals, cargo pants and a tank top. On her shoulder rested a strange tattoo I'd never seen before. Her black hair, which she'd always kept long and to her waist, was now cut to her shoulders. She looked practically depressed as she walked by my car.

Frustrated, I got out of the car and walked towards her. "Jan!" I shouted. "Hey! You cut your hair off? And got a tattoo?"

She didn't respond at first. "Edward."

"I thought you were too sick to even go _outside _or pick up the phone when I called!"

"Edward, please, just go away."

"Excuse me?"

"Go away," she repeated.

I couldn't believe this. "Jan; what happened to you? What's—hey!" I stopped her before she tried to leave. "What happened? Did Sam get to you? Is that what's happening? I thought you were going to _tell _me if he kept bothering you!"

"He hasn't been bothering me!" she snapped. "Sam's trying to _help _me. Don't blame him. But if you want somebody to blame, how about those filthy bloodsuckers you love so much, the Cullens?"

I inhaled sharply and tried not to show my shock. She knew the Cullens were vampires? How could she possibly know about them? Deciding to lie, I said, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"No, you know _exactly _what I'm talking about!" she snarled. "You've been lying to _everyone. _But you can't lie to me. Not anymore."

"Janessa!" shouted Sam.

Sam and his cult weren't too far away and they looked as if they were expecting Janessa to join them in whatever it was they were doing. Janessa looked torn, as she said, "Look, Edward, we can't be friends anymore."

_No, Jan, not you too,_ I thought. "Look, Jan, I know I've been hurting you and I'm sorry. It's killing me. Really, it kills me. I just need…maybe give me some time or something."

"No, don't," she interrupted. "It's not you. It's me. It's true. It is me. I'm not good. I used to be a good kid. Not anymore. This doesn't even matter. It's over."

"You can't leave me. Not you," I said, trying to control my emotions. "I've already lost too much, Jan. I can't lose you too. You're my best friend. You promised me."

"I know," she said, looking heartbroken. "I promised I wouldn't hurt you, Edward. And this is me, keeping that promise. Go home and don't come back, or you're going to get hurt."

She ran off before I could stop her and the pain in the hole in my chest seemed to increase again as I drove off and headed back home. Charlie and Harry hadn't come back yet and I was grateful. I needed to collect my emotions. I typed up another e-mail to Alice and Emmet.

_Guys,_

_Things are worse than ever. When Janessa and I were hanging out, the hole in my chest seemed to heal up a bit. But now something's happened. She's keeping secrets from me and says we can't even be friends anymore. I don't know what's going on and I'd wish she'd tell me. I know I'm hardly one to talk about keeping secrets, but one minute she's confiding in me and then next she's not._

_I don't know what to do anymore. When I saw her again, she looked scared, angry and torn between telling me and keeping her silence about whatever's going on with her and the others on the Reservation. I've lost her now, and in spite of everything's that's happened since I first met you guys, _this _is what's scaring me. It's nuts. Vampires don't scare me, but this does. _

_It feels like nothing's going to be alright ever again. Now I'm starting to wonder if this is all I'm destined for, to be alone and without the people I care about. Is that true? Am I just meant to lose everyone? My parents, you guys, Bella, and Jan? The rush is gone from the motorcycles. Even when I ride them, I don't see Bella anymore and that hurts as bad as our parting._

_I'm starting to wonder if this is how it's going to feel—if this is how it would be if she never existed. When the rain stops, I'm going to find somewhere where I can see her again. With everything that's happened, it's killing me inside. Even my usual work can't keep me occupied anymore. I'll write again after I return from my trip, I promise. I hope that all of you are safe and happy, wherever you may be. _

—_Edward._


	4. Laurent

Laurent

I switched off my computer after saving the e-mail and tried to get some sleep after making Charlie some dinner. I didn't sleep well at all. The next day, I went mine and Bella's meadow where we'd often hung out together when we'd been dating.

It was still too early for the flowers to be in bloom or the grass to be green. The meadow was brown and near plant-less because of the cold, but I didn't care in the slightest. It was still our place.

I just stood there, remembering the times we'd shared and nearly collapsed with grief. I didn't even see her. But I did someone and it was a vampire, and it wasn't a vampire that I was particularly eager to see.

"Edward," he said.

"Laurent," I breathed.

"I didn't expect to find you here," said Laurent, as he encircled me. "I went to visit the Cullens, but the house is empty. I'm surprised they left you behind. Weren't you sort of a pet of theirs?"

"Yeah, you could say that."

"Do the Cullens visit often?" he asked.

For a moment, I didn't know what to say to him, but then I saw Bella's form again. "_Lie,_" she whispered.

"Yeah, they visit a lot," I lied.

"_Lie better,_" Bella said.

"I'll tell them that you stopped by. But I probably shouldn't tell Bella. She tends to be pretty protective of me."

"But she's far away, isn't she?"

_Oh, crap, _I thought. _He knows._

"Why are _you _here?" I demanded.

"I came as a favor to Victoria."

"Victoria?" I repeated.

"She asked me to see if you were still under the protection of the Cullens. Victoria feels it's only fair to kill Bella's mate, given Bella killed Victoria's. An eye for an eye," Laurent explained.

"_Threaten him_," Bella said.

"Bella would know who did it and she'd come after you!"

Laurent shook his head. "I don't think she will. After all, how much could you mean to her if she left you here unprotected?" He sighed. "Victoria won't be happy about my killing you. But I can't help myself. You are so mouthwatering."

"I'm not afraid of you, Laurent," I snarled. "You're a monster. How can you do this? You _helped _me when Victoria and James tried to kill me!"

"No, no, no," he shushed. "Don't be so nervous. I'm doing you a kindness. Victoria plans on killing you slowly and painfully. I'm going to do it quick. I promise you will feel nothing."

I shut my eyes and prepared for the inevitable. "Bella, I love you," I whispered. But then I heard twigs snap and Laurent said, "I don't believe it." I opened my eyes and saw black wolf the size of a horse. It wasn't alone; it had an entire pack with it. They were different shades of brown, but they were still huge and even Laurent seemed frightened as he ran out of the meadow and out of sight.

I stood there, breathing hard, unable to believe what'd just happened. Laurent had tried to kill me and enormous wolves had protected me. What was going on? Then I noticed one golden brown she-wolf standing beside me. I looked into her eyes and was shocked by what I saw in those brown-black depths.

_Oh my gosh, Janessa, is that you? _I thought, shocked and horrified. _What's happened to you? What has Sam done to you? _

The she-wolf just nuzzled the palm of my right hand before snarling and running off with the other wolves. I didn't even think after that, I just ran and headed up to my room when I got home. I had a theory that Janessa was a werewolf and if I was right, so were Sam and the others. And it might've been them who were attacking the humans.

I couldn't tell Charlie about the wolves because I knew it sounded crazy and I couldn't give away Janessa's secret. Nor was there anything I could do and that made me angry. I could only pray that Laurent hadn't killed any of them.

I don't know how long I was up in my room, shirtless and ready for bed, before I heard a clattering at my window. At first, I was expecting Victoria, but then I forced myself to get a grip. I got out bed, opened the window and saw Janessa standing outside.

"Edward!"

"Jan?" I said, relieved. "You scared me. What're you doing?"

"Just back up," she said. "I'm coming up."

I did as she asked and in seconds, she'd climbed up through the window and was in my bedroom, looking perfectly fine. "Hey," she said. "Look, I'm sorry—"

She was cut off as I hugged her tight. "You've nothing to be sorry for. I'm just glad you're all right. I've been worried sick. I thought Laurent might've killed you and the others." She got out of my arms and looked at me in alarm.

"No, I haven't told anyone and nor has anyone said anything to me," I assured her. "I just figured it out today. It's not like I could say anything, even if I wanted to. I don't even know what's going on or what's happened to you. Why are you like this?"

"Look, Edward, believe me, I want to explain, but I _literally _can't," she said. She sighed and her eyes fell onto her dream catcher before she looked at me. "Have you ever had a secret you couldn't tell anyone, one that wasn't yours to share?"

"You're talking to _me_, Jan," I pointed out.

"Well, then you know what I'm going through. You know what it's like for me." She sat down on my bed. "But worse. You have no idea how tight I'm bound."

I sighed as I sat with her and put my hand on her face. "I hate this. I hate what they've done to you."

She put her hand on my arm and then she frowned when she saw the scar on my right shoulder where James had bitten me and nearly killed me months ago. She looked at me; almost in horror before I slipped a shirt on to cover it. She then stood up, sounding almost angry. "I mean the killer part is, you already _know_. Edward, do you remember when we walked on the beach at La Push?"

"Yeah, you told me the story about the Cold Ones."

Janessa looked disappointed. "I guess I'm not surprised why that's the only thing you remember." She turned away from me and walked to the other end of the room towards my dresser.

"There's got to be something you can do," I said. "Or something I could do to help you, Janessa. Please."

"That's sweet of you, but there's nothing you can do. I'm in this for life."

I sighed. "Maybe we should just get out of here for a while. Just leave, just you and me together."

"You'd do that?" she asked, shocked.

I nodded. "I would do it for you."

She sighed and shook her head. "It's nothing something I can just run away from, Edward. But I _would _run away with you if I could." She inhaled sharply as I put my hand on her shoulder to comfort her. "I've got to go. They'll start wondering where I am."

"Come here," I whispered. I hugged her tight and she sank into my embrace. "I'll be here if you need me, Jan, I promise."

"Thank you," she whispered. "Please, just try to remember. It would be so much easier if you really knew."

Before I could say anything else, she'd disappeared through the window and into the darkness of the night.


	5. Werewolves and Vampires

Werewolves and Vampires

I dreamt of Bella and Janessa that night. And suddenly I remembered the one tiny thing Janessa had told me in the story. Her people were descended from wolves. She and the others _were _the same wolves that'd protected me.

The next morning, I stormed over to Janessa's and knocked on the door. After a few moments, Billy greeted me.

"Edward," he said.

"Where is she?" I demanded. "I need to see her."

"She's not in."

I could tell he was lying and that angered me. I stepped aside and went in the house, ignoring Billy's protests. "Okay, I'm sorry. I just really need to see her, Billy."

"Edward!"

I ignored him and found Janessa in her room, completely out of it. She looked exhausted, but at peace as she slept. I bit back a sigh as I brushed some of her hair out of her face. Then I saw Sam and the others approaching and suddenly my anger outweighed my compassion as I stormed out.

"What did you do?" I demanded. "What did you do to Janessa?"

"Easy!" he snarled, as some of the others growled.

"She didn't want this!"

"What _we _do?" said Paul, angrily. "What _she _do? What did she tell you?"

"Nothing! She tells me nothing because she's scared of you!" I snarled.

They all laughed and that only made me angrier as I punched Paul in the jaw. That proved to be a mistake as Paul's anger seemed to overcome his self-control. Everyone told him to calm down as he turned into one of the enormous brown and black wolves I'd seen yesterday.

"Edward!" Janessa shouted. She'd woken up and she could see what was happening to me and the others.

"Janessa, don't!" I shouted, as I ran.

But she didn't listen to me as she turned into the golden brown she-wolf from before and launched herself at Paul. They were having a huge fight and it was my fault. What on earth had I been thinking? Simple, I _hadn't_.

"Hey," said Sam. "Take Edward to Emily's place."

"Guess the wolf's out of the bag," said Embry.

I tried to control my breathing as they escorted me to "Emily's place." My mind was burning with questions. Was it possible that _everything _I'd once believed to be a myth was true? Was it possible that nothing was ever going to make sense again? It was all crazy. Just crazy. But then again, so was I, or I probably wouldn't have fallen for a vampire.

As Quil and Embry directed me to Emily's, they explained that the werewolf thing was just genetic. It happened once every few generations depending on who got the gene—usually it was the males, but it wasn't unheard of for a girl to change too. Strong emotion was the trigger for the change, not the full moon. No one had _done _anything to Janessa, she'd just been unlucky enough to pick up the shape-shifting gene.

I was slightly relieved, but I was still worried about Janessa. When we arrived and they got out, I said, "Hey, I think we should go back and check on Janessa."

"I hope Pauls sinks his teeth into her. Serves her right," said Quil.

"No way. Jan's a natural. Did you see her phase on the fly? I've got five that says Paul doesn't even _touch _her," said Embry. "Come on in, Edward. We won't bite."

"Speak for yourself," said Quil.

I sighed as I got out and joined them.

"Oh, hey, about Emily, Sam's fiancée, don't stare. It bugs Sam," Quil warned.

"Why would I stare?"

But no one answered me as they went in and I heard a soft female voice say, "Are you guys hungry? Like I even have to ask."

I stood in the doorway, still slightly unsure as to whether or not I should come in. I could see why Sam disliked people staring at Emily. She had some scars on the right side of her face that weren't pretty. I shifted my gaze away from them as Emily looked at me. "Who's this?" she asked.

"Edward Swan, who else?" said Embry.

"So, you're the vampire boy," said Emily.

"So, you're the wolf girl," I shot back.

She chuckled. "Guess so. Well, I'm engaged to one." She put down some food and just as Embry reached for it, she swatted his hand. "Save some for your brothers, and guests first. Muffin, Edward?"

"Sure, thanks," I said, as I sat down. I took a muffin and bit into it. I found that they were pretty good. "These are delicious."

"Thank you," said Emily, smiling. "Leave it to Janessa to find a way around Sam's gag order."

"She didn't say anything to me. I just figured it out," I said.

"You're a clever guy, Edward," said Quil. "Janessa's silence, that's a wolf thing. Alpha's orders get obeyed whether we want them to or not. Oh, and check it out. We can hear each other's thoughts."

"Will you shut up? These are trade secrets!" said Embry. "This guy runs with _vampires_."

"Well, you can't really run with vampires. 'Cause they're fast," I said, making them laugh.

"Well, we're faster," said Embry. "Freaked out yet?"

I shook my head. "You're not the first non-humans I've met."

"Jan's right," said Sam, as he came in. "You're good with weird."

I didn't reply and turned my gaze away when he and Emily started kissing. Relief entered my heart when I saw Janessa and Paul come back, looking perfectly fine and playfully shoving one another. Paul sat down and said, "Sorry," to me.

"It's okay. It was my fault. I provoked you," I said. "I should've known better."

He just nodded and then I looked back at Janessa who was beckoning for me to join her outside. I did as she wanted and we took a walk on the beach. "So," I said. "My best friend is a werewolf."

"Last I checked," she said. "I take it Quil and Embry told you about the gene?"

I nodded.

"Girls don't usually have it, but it's not unheard of if she's lucky enough to get it. A bloodsucker moves into town and the fever sets in."

"Mono," I repeated. Billy had claimed Janessa had mono for the first few weeks until I'd gotten some answers.

Janessa chuckled. "I wish."

"Well, can't you find a way to just _stop_? I mean, it's wrong."

She stopped walking and looked at me. "It's not a _lifestyle _choice, Edward. I was born this way. I can't help it. You're such a hypocrite. What; am I not the right non-human for you?" she demanded.

"No, I didn't mean that. It's not what you are. It's what you _do_. _They _never hurt anybody. You've _killed _people, Jan."

"Edward!" she said, sounding angry. "We're not killing anyone."

I was confused yet again. If it wasn't Janessa and her pack killing those people, then who was? Suddenly, it hit me. Victoria _was _here and those unfortunate people who'd died had been her meals. "It's vampires, isn't it?" I said.

She nodded. "They're the only thing we do kill, the only thing that we're trying to protect you people from."

"But Jan, you can't—"

"Don't worry, your precious Cullens are safe," she interrupted. "We can't touch them unless they violate the treaty."

"That's not what I'm talking about, Jan!" I said, annoyed. "I'm just worried about you, alright? You can't kill vampires. They're dangerous and they'll kill _you_."

Janessa folded her arms and raised an eyebrow. "Really? We took out the leech with the dreads easy enough."

"You _killed _Laurent?" I said, both impressed and shocked.

"And his redheaded girlfriend's up next."

"So, Victoria _is _here?"

"Was," she corrected. "We chased her up as far as the Canadian border the other night. But she keeps coming back. We don't know what she's after."

I sighed. "I do. She's after me." When Janessa gave me a questioning look, I said, "Bella killed Victoria's mate, James, when he tried to have me for a snack last year and now Victoria wants revenge on Bella. She'll stop at nothing to kill me."

"And that's why you have that scar on your shoulder?"

I nodded. "Yes. There wasn't enough venom to change me, so Bella sucked it out. That's the only reason I'm not dead right now."

Janessa exhaled sharply. "Edward; I've got to know, why are the vampires so attracted to _you _in particular?" she asked.

I shrugged and sighed. "My blood's scent just draws them in. It's strong, powerful and what they want. The Cullen restrained themselves because of their diet. But Bella never once tried to kill me in her life. Anyway, what're we going to do about Victoria?"

"Well, we're not going to let her take you away," said Janessa. "Look, we'll be careful, I promise. You don't have to worry. We can take care of ourselves."

I sighed again and nodded. Later, she bandaged and iced my hand as it was hurt from when I'd punched Paul in the face. I hadn't even realized it was aching until Janessa had mended it. Later, she insisted on protecting me even though I told her I'd be fine. She accompanied me back to my house. "Don't worry; we've got this place covered. She won't get near you or Charlie."

"Look, please, just promise me that _you'll _be careful. Victoria's fast. You don't know how fast she is."

"You know, your lack of confidence in us is a little insulting," she said, teasingly. "But, I promise I'll be careful. Now, I've got to get going. I've got a vampire to kill."

I nodded and let her go.


	6. A Powerful Rush

A Powerful Rush

Over the next week, the pain returned. It seemed like I was alone all the time. Charlie was after Janessa, Janessa was after Victoria and the Cullens were gone. I told my friends I was having a bad day and needed some time on my own and they stepped aside for a day or two. Finally, I realized what I had to do to see Bella again.

I grabbed some things and then drove to the cliffs where I'd seen Sam and the others jumping before. I parked a little aways and then walked up over to the cliff and saw the churning waters. Janessa had said this was a terrifying rush and that's all I needed and all I wanted—just enough of a rush to see Bella again. Before I even jumped, I saw her.

"_Don't do this_," Bella whispered.

"You wanted me to be human," I said. "Watch me."

I shed my jacket as I prepared to jump.

"_Please,_" she begged. "_For me._"

"You won't stay with me any other way!"

"_Edward, please_."

I ignored her. I then shut my eyes and felt the rush as I jumped and landed in the water. The next few moments were shocking before I gulped for air at the surface. Before I could react further, a wave came crashing down on me. Suddenly, I felt like I was in a washing machine as I struggled to get up for air. Then suddenly I saw something under the water. No, it was some_one _with red hair and they were moving fast.

_Victoria, _I realized. She'd found me. Oh heaven, she'd _found _me. I tried to get out of the water, but I couldn't move in the direction I wanted before I hit a rock and passed out into darkness.

The next thing I knew, I was feeling the cold air on my wet skin. Someone was breathing into my mouth. Air entered my lungs and then I leaned onto my side and coughed up water before I rested on my back. When I opened my eyes, I saw Janessa was hovering over me, looking scared.

"Jan?" I whispered.

She heaved a sigh of relief. "Come here." She hugged me tight before glaring at me. "You are such a stupid, brainless_,_ andreckless _idiot, _Edward Swan! You scared me half to death! What in heaven's name were you _thinking?_"

"I'm sorry," I said. "I wasn't trying to scare you. I just wanted to see something."

"Get him home!" shouted Sam. "I'll go back to Harry's!"

I looked at Janessa, confused. "What's going on?"

Janessa hesitated and then looked upset. "Harry Clearwater's had a heart attack. Your dad and Billy's with his family."

"Is Harry okay?"

She shook her head. "He's gone." She sighed and her face was unreadable. "Come on; let's get you in some dry clothes. I'll take you home."

After I got changed, we drove back to my house. The heat was on, but I couldn't stop shivering until Janessa put a hand on my shoulder and beckoned for me to sit closer to her, which I did. She took my cupped hands into one of hers and warmed them up.

"Thanks," I said. "It must be nice never getting cold."

"It's a wolf thing."

I shook my head. "No, it's not. It's a Janessa thing. You're just warm. You're like your own sun."

She chuckled, but then looked solemn. "It feels so much better to have you know about what I am, Edward. It doesn't feel so bad now."

"But—?" I prompted.

She sighed. "But, I'm still as scared as ever. You saw Emily. Sam got angry, lost for a split second and Emily was standing too close. He'll never be able to take that back. What if I get mad and you pay the price for my anger?" She turned away before I could answer and said, "Sometimes, I feel like I'm going to disappear."

I squeezed her shoulder. "Okay, I want you to listen to me. It's not like you need me to tell you something like this, but I always will. You're not going to lose yourself. I wouldn't let that happen."

"How?"

"Because everyday, I'll tell you how special you are."

Janessa didn't say anything. But she leaned closer to me and we nearly kissed, but then I pulled away and rested my head on her shoulder for a moment before turning my gaze to the ground. I was regretful about Janessa's feelings, but I just couldn't do it. I couldn't kiss her if I didn't love her, that wasn't fair. My heart was Bella's and no else's.

"Thank you, for everything."

"No problem," said Janessa, looking disappointed.

I was about to get out, but then Janessa reached over and slammed the car door shut. "Wait. There's a vampire," she said.

"How do you know?" I asked.

"I can smell it. I'm getting you out of here."

My mind was racing as she switched on the ignition. Had Victoria seen me in the water and followed my scent? But then I looked out the window and my heart skipped a beat when I saw Carlisle's car. "That's Carlisle's car," I said. "They're here." I got out and headed for the door before Janessa stopped me.

"Edward, it's a trick! Stop! You've got to come with me!"

"The Cullens won't hurt me," I insisted, as I yanked my hand from her.

Janessa sighed in anger and glared at me. "Look, if a Cullen is back, this is _their _territory. The treaty says we can only defend on our lands. I can't protect you here."

"You don't have to."

"You're about to cross a line."

"Then don't draw one," I said, sharply.

Without looking back, I went in and shut the door. Charlie was still out and the house was dark. When I finally switched the lights on, I saw Alice standing behind me looking terrified.

"Alice?" I said, shocked.

"Edward!"

I hugged her tight for several moments before I let her go. I'd missed the pixie-vampire greatly. She'd been like a little sister to me—the one I never had. When I let go, she was looking at me in shock and I was looking at her the same way. "I'm sorry; it's just that…I can't believe you're here! Is—"

"Would you like to explain to me how you're alive?" she interrupted.

"What?"

"I saw a vision of you. You jumped off a cliff. What in heaven's name would you try to kill yourself?" she demanded. "What about Charlie and—"

"I didn't try to kill myself," I interrupted. She looked at me like I was crazy, which I probably was. I ran my fingers through my hair and tried not to sound like an idiot. "I was cliff jumping. Recreationally. It was fun."

Alice looked like she was about to explode with shock and frustration before I pulled her on to the couch and grabbed myself bottle of water. I explained to Alice what I'd been doing since she and the others had moved and why I'd jumped, and when I finished, she said, "I have never met anyone more prone to life-threatening idiocy."

"Does…did you tell _her?_" I asked.

Alice shook her head. "No. She only calls in once every few months. She said she wanted to be alone. I haven't even seen her since we left Forks."

I couldn't understand why Bella would leave her family. She'd once told me they were all she had besides me. But that had been a long time ago. It was before she left. Perhaps things had changed.

Alice's nose wrinkled. "Edward, what is that awful wet-dog smell?"

"Oh," I said, trying to figure out what to say. "That would probably be me or it's Janessa."

"Janessa who?" she asked, looking confused.

I hesitated. I'd forgotten neither she nor Emmet had ever gotten my e-mails because they hadn't gone through and I never sent the majority of them off. "Janessa Black. She's kind of a werewolf."

Alice rolled her eyes. "Edward! Werewolves are not good company to keep."

"Speak for yourself," said Janessa.

Alice and I turned to see her standing there, looking concerned.

"I had to see that you were safe," said Janessa.

"I thought you couldn't protect me here," I said.

"Guess I don't care."

"Well, I won't hurt him," said Alice.

"Of course, you're just a harmless Cullens," said Janessa, sarcastically. "I'm talking about the other bloodsucker that tried to kill Edward because of you."

"Victoria?" said Alice.

I nodded. "Yeah, Victoria's been around and so has Laurent. Laurent was killed a couple of days ago, but Victoria escaped."

"I didn't see her, Laurent or you getting pulled out of the water." She glared at Janessa. "I can't see past you and your pack of mutts."

Janessa looked angry and I came between them before a cat fight would start. "Hey, hey, I'll have none of that. Both of you, stop it," I said.

"I'll give you a moment," said Alice.

"Hey, you're not going anywhere. You're going to come back, right?" I asked.

"As soon as you put the dog out," said Alice, before leaving the house. I sighed and then looked at Janessa, who seemed upset.

"Is _she _here? Are there others? How many Cullens are here and how long are they staying in Forks?" Janessa demanded.

"No," I said, as I went into the kitchen. "It's just Alice. And she can stay as long as she likes. And no, I don't think there's anymore coming back, at least, not that I know of. Is there anything else?"

"No. That's it."

"Well, if that's all, then you'd better run back to Sam."

Janessa sighed. "I've done it again. I keep breaking my promise."

"Janessa," I said, sighing again. "We don't have to do this to each other."

"Yes, we do," said Janessa, as she caressed my face. "Edward," she whispered, before saying something another language I didn't speak. She kept leaning in closer to me and then the phone rang. She answered it. "Swan Residence…he's not here right now, he's arranging a funeral."

"Who was that?" I asked; when she hung up. "What?"

"Always in the way," she muttered.

"Who was that?"

"Edward, step back."

"Jan, who _was _that?" I demanded, growing angry.

"Edward, it's Bella!" said Alice, as she burst into the kitchen. She looked terrified. "She thinks you're dead. Rosalie told her why I came here."

I was filled with anger and was horrified as I glared at Janessa. Now I knew who'd called and I knew why. I couldn't believe what Janessa had just done. "Why would you…why didn't you let me speak to her?" I yelled.

"She didn't ask for you!" Janessa yelled.

"I don't care!" I was about to doing something rash, when Alice stopped me. "Edward! Edward, she's going to the Volturi. She wants to die too. Come on."

I grabbed my jacket, left Charlie a note explaining what I could before I followed Alice to the car and tried to ignore Janessa's protests. "She left you, Edward! She didn't want you anymore, remember?"

"I'm not going to let her kill herself out of guilt!"

"What about your dad?"

"I'm eighteen. I'm legally free to go and I left him a note," I said, as I slid into the car and slammed my door shut.

Janessa looked desperate as she reached across the seats from Alice's window and took my hand. "Please, Edward. Just stay here, for Charlie…or for me."

"I have to go," I said, pulling my hand away. "She needs me."

"And, what about the rest of us: your family and friends, Edward? _We _need you too! I'm begging you," she whispered. "Please."

"Goodbye, Janessa."

I felt a little pain when I saw how broken she looked, but I forced myself to ignore it as Alice drove off and we went to Volterra. Bella may not have wanted me anymore, but I was not going to let her die—not because of me.

The flight to Italy seemed to take forever and once we touched down, Alice swiped a car and we drove as fast as we could. I could barely breathe and I couldn't sleep because I was worried sick and scared out of my mind for Bella. I couldn't believe she was going to kill herself for _me_. I couldn't let that happen. _Please don't let it be too late._ Suddenly, Alice gasped as a vision hit her.

"What is it? What do you see?" I asked.

"They refused her."

"So?"

"She's going to make a scene, reveal herself to the humans."

"No! When?" I demanded.

"She's going to wait until noon, when the sun's at its highest."

My mind was reeling. _Bella, why are you doing this to yourself? I'm not worth it. _When we finally arrived, we were in a beautiful city surrounded with people dressed in red for the Saint Marco's Day Festival—celebration of the expulsion of vampires—and they had vampires underneath their city, how ironic was that? Alice kept honking the car horn to clear a path and when she parked, I quickly got out of the car and looked at Alice when she didn't come with me.

"Alice!"

"Edward, you're the only one she can't see coming. If I go, she'll read my thoughts and think I'm lying. She'll rush into it."

"Where do I find her?"

"She'll be under the clock tower. Go!"

I nodded, slammed the door shut and ran as fast as I could as I tried to find the clock tower. I had less than five minutes. I kept looking frantically for any sign of Bella until I finally spotted her under the clock tower as it tolled noon. She looked depressed and broken, her eyes were shut and she was wearing a thin, low-cut tank top instead of her usual long sleeved shirt, and short pants instead of her usual jeans, as she slowly stepped forward into the sunlight.

_Oh, heaven help us. Bella, no! _I didn't even think. I just ran through the fountain and across the courtyard. "Don't!" I shouted.


	7. You're Alive

You're Alive

I pushed her out of the sunlight and into the shadows of the arch. My arms were wrapped around her and she had her hands in my hair. Her eyes were shut.

"Heaven," she murmured.

"You need to move," I said, urgently. "Open your eyes. Look at me. I'm alive."

She finally opened those beautiful topaz eyes and looked at me as if she was dreaming.

"You need to move," I whispered.

"Edward," she whispered.

I pushed her inside and shut the door. I kept my hand on her cheek and ran my fingers through her mahogany locks. I was breathing hard, shaking and my heart was pounding as I realized how close I'd come to losing her again. I'd never been so scared in my entire life. Bella also seemed shocked and happy that I was there.

"Edward," she said again.

"Bella," I said.

"You're here."

"I'm here."

"You're alive," she said, sounding overjoyed and on the verge of tears.

"Yes," I said. Her eyes never left my face as I went on. "I needed to make you see me once. You had to know that I was alive, that you didn't have to feel guilty about anything." I swallowed painfully and my voice was shaking. Now came the part that I dreaded. "I can let you go now."

She looked at me and a few tears rolled down her pale cheek. "I never acted out of guilt. I just couldn't live in a world where you don't exist."

"What?" I said, shocked. "But you said—"

"I lied, I had to lie." She looked heartbroken and sniffled from tears as she said, "But you believed me so easily."

I couldn't believe what I'd just heard and tried to come up with an answer. How could I _not _have believed her? She'd never given me any reason not to. I loved her, but when it came down to what we were, why would she love me? "Because it doesn't make sense for you to love me," I said. "I mean, I'm nothing. I'm human. I'm nothing."

She fingered my cheek and her topaz eyes were full of glittering tears and love. She shook her head. Her voice seemed to crack a little, as she said, "Edward, you're everything to me. You're _everything._"

Without anymore hesitation, I cupped her face as she wrapped her arms around my neck and we kissed each other for the first time in months. Suddenly I felt happier than I had in such a long time. I had my Bella back. She loved me and I loved her. The hole in my chest was now fully healed. I never wanted to let go of her and I could tell she didn't want to let go of me either.

But then she broke off the kiss. I turned my head to see what she was looking at, and saw two vampires with crimson eyes, dressed in expensive clothing approach us. I immediately knew them from the painting. _The Volturi, _my mind whispered. _They've come for us._

Bella kept a protective arm around me and looked them frostily. "I won't be needing your services anymore, gentleman."

"Aro wants to speak with you again," said Felix.

"No rules were broken," she said.

"Nonetheless, we should take this conversation to a more _appropriate_ venue," said Demetri.

"Fine," said Bella, glaring at them. She didn't take her eyes off them as she said, "Edward; why don't you go out and enjoy the rest of the festival?"

"The boy comes with us," said Felix.

"No, you can go to Tartarus," she snarled.

Just then, the door broke and Alice came in. "Come on, guys," she said. "It's a festival. You wouldn't want to make a scene."

"We wouldn't," Demetri agreed.

"Enough," said a scary-looking blond girl.

"Jane," said Bella, disgustedly.

"Aro sent me to find out what's taking so long."

She turned around and started walking. We all followed her—though Bella and I did unwillingly. I put my oversized coat on Bella's slender frame, covering her exposed skin. We went down several floors until we came into a throne room with the leading members of the Volturi, Aro, Marcus and Caius.

I recognized them from Bella's story and the picture back at her house. Unlike the Cullens, these vampires didn't make me feel comfortable. They were all red-eyed and looked like murdering psychopaths. I wasn't afraid for myself, but rather for Bella and Alice. If the Volturi killed them, then I'd willingly die too.

Aro approached us, sounding excited. "What a happy surprise! Edward is alive after all. Isn't that _wonderful? _I love a happy ending!"

He took Bella's hand in his, making her inhale sharply. I would've torn him apart with my bare hands at that moment for making her uncomfortable like that if Alice hadn't had such a firm grip on my arm.

"They are so rare," said Aro, before saying something in Italian. I realized he was calling me Bella's singer. His red eyes kept shifting from Bella to me. "His blood appeals to you so much, it makes me thirsty. How can you stand to be so close to him?"

"It's not without difficulty," said Bella, sounding hoarse.

"Yes, I can see that," said Aro, chuckling.

"Aro can read every thought I've ever had with one touch," she explained to me. She glared at Aro. "And now you know everything. So get on with it."

Aro smirked and his red eyes shifted from her to me again. "You are quite a soul reader yourself, Isabella. Though, you can't read Edward's thoughts. Fascinating," He let go of Bella's hand and stepped back. "I would love to see if you're an exception to my gifts as well. Would you do me the honor?"

I hesitated, but then I gave him my hand. I didn't know what I'd be feeling when he touched me, but nothing happened and it didn't seem to please Aro when he failed to see my thoughts. "Interesting," he said. "I see nothing. I wonder if…let us see if he is immune to all our powers. Shall we, Jane?"

Before I could react, Bella let out a snarl and then Jane said, "Pain."

Within moments, Bella looked to be in intense pain and I could see it was taking all she had not to scream. By some miracle, I yanked myself free of Alice's grip and then ran over to Bella's side, just like she'd done with me with James. "Bella! Bella, look at me. Focus on me, Bella," I said. "Listen to me. I'm right here. Just hang on to me. It's going to be okay." She didn't say anything, but a few tears escaped her eyes and she put a tight grip on me before she buried her face in my chest. I held her in my arms and rocked her. It was too much. It was killing me to see her in so much pain like this. "Stop it! Stop! Let her go! Please, just stop hurting her!"

"Jane?" said Aro.

Jane turned her head and Bella's tight grip on me eased. The pain Bella was feeling was gone. She looked at me with gratitude and relief. She was even shaking a little as she hugged me tight. "Oh, gall, Edward," she whispered.

"I'm here, Bella," I murmured, grateful she was okay. "It's alright. It's going to be okay. I won't let them take you, I promise."

"Extraordinary," said Aro, as he watched us. "_She's_ the superior being. She's the one with the vampire gifts and strengths, she even desires your blood to satisfy her thirst and yet you feel protective of her."

"I feel protective of her because I love her. That's something _you_ could _never_ understand," I snarled, not taking my eyes off of Bella as I helped her to stand up. She still clung to me, but she seemed to have recovered from Jane's mental attack and I hoped I'd never have to see her in pain like that again.

Then Aro turned to Jane said, "Go ahead, my dear."

"This may hurt just a little," said Jane.

I shut my eyes as Bella wrapped arms tightly around me. I was expecting intense pain, but just like with Aro's touch-telepathy, nothing happened. Jane looked furious with me, but Aro was actually laughing excitedly. "Remarkable! He confounds us all! So, what do we do with you now?"

"You already know what you're going to do, Aro," said Marcus.

"He knows too much. He's a liability," said Caius.

"Hmm, that's true," said Aro, as I glared at him. "Felix?"

Suddenly, the other Volturi members tried to kill me, but Alice and Bella defended me. I fought against them, but my human strength against their vampire powers did next to no good. I couldn't do anything useful. Then they had Bella by the throat and were about to kill her until I shouted, "No! Please! No! Stop it! Kill me!" I shouted. "Not her. Please. Not her. Kill me instead."

Aro held up his hands and everyone froze and then he looked at me in curiosity. "How extraordinary," he said. "You would sacrifice yourself for one of our kind, a vampire? A soulless monster?" he added as he looked at Bella, who struggled against her captor.

"Just get away from him!" Bella snarled, through her choke hold.

"She's _not_ a soulless monster, _you_ are," I said, angrily. "You don't know a thing about her soul. It's beautiful. It's pure. It's because she's not like you! And I would die a billion times over for her and the rest of the Cullens."

Aro spoke in Italian again before saying, "This is a sadness. If only it were your intention to give him immortality."

"She may not do it, but that doesn't mean someone else won't do it," I said. "Please, I'll become one of you by another's hand if you'll just let us go and stop hurting her."

"He's telling the truth," said Alice. "Edward will be changed and become one of us. I've seen it. I'll change him myself."

Aro paused for a moment and then he took Alice's hand in his. "Mesmerizing," he murmured. "To see as you have seen before it has happened." He turned to me and touched my face. I forced myself not to flinch under the feel of his cold hand. "Your gifts will make an intriguing immortal, Edward Swan." He then stepped back and turned around, allowing me to breathe easier. "Go now. Make your preparations."

"Let us be done with this," said Marcus, as I took Bella into my arms. "Heidi will arrive at any moment. Thank you for your visit."

"We'll return the favor," said Caius. "I would advise that you follow through on your promises soon. We do not offer second chances."

"Good-bye, my young friends," said Aro.

I bit back a sigh of relief as I helped Bella to stand and kept an arm around her as we left the building and got on a plane back to Forks. Because I hadn't slept once since leaving Forks, I was beginning to feel tired. I ignored this and continued talking with Bella and holding her hand throughout the flight. Bella also seemed to be clinging to me as she hadn't let go of me and kept her head on my shoulder during the flight.

She still seemed distressed about my "suicide attempt," so I ended up telling her the truth about Alice's vision and about Janessa Black's transformation to a werewolf. Bella just shook her head at me and called me a trouble magnet, but also added that she was grateful Janessa had kept me safe and alive. I just squeezed her hand and told Bella _she _was what kept me going, which seemed to make her happy. I hummed our lullaby as I started to drift off and Bella noticed.

"Edward?" she said.

"What?" I asked.

"You're exhausted. Get some sleep."

I shook my head. "No, love," I said. "If I fall asleep, I might wake up and find this just dream. I don't want it to be."

"Edward…" she murmured, as she wrapped an arm around me. "I swear, I'll be here when you wake up."

I sighed as I pressed my head against hers. I didn't fall asleep and forced myself to stay awake with some coffee the flight attendant offered me. When the flight finally ended, we picked up Carlisle's car and we drove back to Forks. On the way, Alice told me that all of the Cullens were back and had missed me. I was happy. Things could get back to normal now. Well, as normal as could be in Forks. When we got back to my house, it was late and Charlie was outside waiting for me, looking furious.

"Edward, where have you been?" he demanded. "You've been gone for three days! I've been worried to death! Janessa Black's been crying her eyes out with worry thinking you're _dead_. Your note didn't explain _anything!_"

"Dad, I—"

Bella interrupted. "It's my fault, Chief Swan."

Charlie narrowed his eyes. "What're you doing here? You broke him and now you've come back? For what reason?"

"I never meant to hurt him, sir," she said. "There were some problems I had to take care of that I couldn't tell Edward about, so I lied and left to do what I had to. But then I ran into some trouble, Alice told Edward and he came after me to protect me. The problem's been taken care of and now my family and I are staying in Forks for as long as possible."

Charlie looked at me. "Is this true?"

"Yes, it's true," I said. "Look, Dad, I know you don't like it, but Bella and I love each other and I'm not losing her again. If I have to move out to be with her, then I will. Please, don't make me choose."

Charlie sighed. "Fine," he said, gruffly. "I'll accept the two of you together, but you're still living under my roof and you're grounded for one week." He turned his gaze to Bella. "Until that week's over, _you, _Miss Cullen, are not going to set one foot through this door, am I clear on that?"

"Crystal clear, sir," said Bella.

With that, Charlie went back into the house.

I turned to Bella and hugged her again. "Wait for me in my room," I murmured.

"I will," she said.

I nodded and then I went inside.

Charlie was sitting at the table and I sat next to him. Although he'd been fairly gracious, I could see he was still upset.

"Edward—" he began, but I cut him off.

"Dad, when I left, I wasn't trying to worry you," I interrupted. "I left because I heard that Bella was in danger. I thought she was going be killed. And regardless of what happened between us, I couldn't take chance. There wasn't time to do anything else. I just had to do something."

He sighed again. "I understand, but I still think you could pick a different girl. But as long as you're happy, then I'll accept it."

"Thanks," I said, as I stood up. "I'm tired; I'm going to get some sleep."

He nodded and then I went upstairs. I changed into some pajamas in the bathroom and went into my bedroom. Bella was in there, waiting for me, on the bed. I felt my exhaustion catch up with me as I slipped into bed and Bella curled up beside me.

"I love you," she whispered. "Sleep, Edward."

I didn't have time to respond to her as I fell asleep. My peaceful slumber only lasted a few hours because of another nightmare. When I woke up, instead of being alone as I had for the past four months, I saw Bella. She was still sitting beside me with her hand in mine and she looked a little concerned.

"It's okay. You can sleep," she murmured. "I'll still be here when you wake up."

I squeezed her hand and tried to control my breathing. "You're here," I said. I was happy again, but my mind was still trying to accept the fact that she was back and wasn't going to leave me again. I knew things were going to be okay, but I couldn't stop wondering about some things.

Why had she left me in the first place? Why did she lie? What was the point of all that? As if she _could _read my mind, she said, "Edward, the only reason I left was because I thought I was protecting you. I needed to give you the chance of a normal, happy life."

"It was so easy for you to leave," I said, without thinking. I mentally slapped myself for saying that.

She didn't look offended, she just shook her head. "Leaving you was the hardest thing I've done in a hundred years." I saw a tear roll down her cheek. I could see she meant it. "And I swear I will _never_ fail you again." She pressed her hand against my face. "I'm so sorry."

"I know," I said. "It's okay."

Bella's head jerked up. "Charlie's coming."

She quickly hid as Charlie came in and I pretended to be asleep until the door shut again. Then Bella knelt beside the bed. "I'm not technically breaking his rules. He said I couldn't take a step inside the door for a week, but I used the window." She shut her eyes. "He's not going to forgive me easily."

"I know."

"Can you?" she asked. "I hope you can. Because I honestly don't know how I could live without you." Tears started streaming down her face.

"Hey, hey, hey, what is it?" I asked. "What's wrong?"

"I found the e-mails you wrote to Alice and Emmet. If I had known how bad things were…I'm so, so sorry, Edward. I never should've left you."

My heart went out to her as I wiped her tears away with my thumbs. "Come here," I murmured. I kissed her again before pulled her onto the bed and she curled up beside me with her head on my chest and our arms around each other as I stroked her hair. I knew she'd been miserable as well since our parting and now I was going to change that. "Bella, listen to me. I love you more than anything and _nothing _will make me stop loving you. There's _nothing_ to forgive. And when I'm changed, you can't get rid me."

"I know. I love you too," she said.

I kept my arms around her while I hummed our lullaby before falling asleep. _Bella's back_, my mind whispered. _Everything's going to be all right again. _And suddenly, I found that I could believe in that. Everything was going to be OK.


	8. My Choice Is You

My Choice Is You

I decided to be changed after graduation to make it easier on Charlie. After that, I'd be free to live forever with Bella and the Cullens. But I needed to know something. So, after my house arrest was over, I went to see the Cullens to see if _they _approved of the course of my life.

I was glad to see everyone again and the feeling was mutual, but I had to know. Bella, of course, didn't want me to be changed, but she was accepting my decision and swore that she'd stay with me during my change and wouldn't leave me to go through it alone, even though I told her she didn't need to.

"You all know what I want," I said, to the Cullens. "But I want to know if it's what you want. So, I want to put it to a vote to be fair."

Alice was the first to speak. She smiled and hugged me tight. "I already consider you my brother."

"I vote yes," said Jasper. "It would be nice to _not _want to kill you all the time."

I didn't know how to respond to that, so I just nodded.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry to both of you for how I've acted. And I'm grateful that you were brave enough to go and save my sister from the Volturi," said Rosalie. "But this isn't a life I would've chosen for myself. And I wish there would've been someone to vote no for me. So, my answer's no."

I was a little disappointed, but I understood how she felt. Emmet, on the other, just grinned and took me into one of his bear hugs. "Well, I say, heck yes!" he said. "And we can pick a fight with these Volturi some other way."

I chuckled and thanked him.

"I already consider you part of the family, so yes." said Esme.

"The same goes for me," said Carlisle. "You're already my son in my eyes."

Feelings of happiness spread through me. "Thank you," I said. I looked over at Bella, who didn't seem happy about this. As if Carlisle could read her mind, he said, "Bella, I'm not doing this to be cruel. I'm doing it because I care. You tried to live a life without Edward and I saw how it almost destroyed you both. I'm not losing my daughter _or_ my son again."

Bella sighed and then nodded. "I understand," she said.

"Thank you," I told them. I then went over to Bella and took her hand in mine. "Come with me." I took her to our meadow where the flowers were in full bloom. It was beautiful, just like it always was this time of year. We lay down together after she'd shed her jacket. She was sparkling in the sun like always, making her even more beautiful. After several long moments, I sat up.

"Bella?" I said.

"Yes?" she asked.

"After graduation, before I'm changed, there's something I want you to do."

"What is it?"

I pulled out a gold ring with emeralds and diamonds. I'd chosen Grandmother's emerald ring because emeralds were Bella's favorite gemstone and I wanted her to remember my green eyes after my change.

I'd already asked the Cullens for permission to propose to Bella and they'd all heartily agreed—even Rosalie, and that surprised me. "You're the most important person in my entire life and I can't imagine spending an immortal life with anyone else. Isabella Marie Cullen, will you marry me?"

She looked shocked and tears glistened in her eyes before she slipped the ring on and kissed me. "Yes," she said; when we broke apart. "Yes."

I smiled and kissed her again until she broke it off when her phone rang. She answered it and I could hear Alice's voice.

"You said yes! You're getting married! Oh, this is wonderful! Congratulations! You've got to let me plan the wedding. Please, please, please?_" _

"Okay, okay, you can plan the wedding," said Bella.

Alice squealed. "Thank you! Thank you! Oh, you're going to love it!"

When Bella hung up, we both laughed.

"She's going to go bonkers over this, you know," I said.

"Yeah, but she's our sister. What else can we do?" said Bella.

I agreed and kissed Bella again before someone cleared their throat. I reluctantly pulled away, turned my gaze and saw Janessa standing not too far away from us. She looked anything but happy as we quickly stood up.

"Janessa," I began, but she cut me off.

"I know about your plans. I've spoken with the pack," she said. She sounded as though she was trying not to cry. "They've agreed that as long as the change is what _you _want and it happens somewhere else—not in Forks, the treaty will not be broken, and they'll allow your desires to occur, and you can remain here afterwards."

"Thank you," I said.

"Don't thank me. I had to do _something_ on your behalf," she said. "Understand that the _only _reasons I did that is because I love you, Edward, and if it wasn't for the fact that I know you're happier and in love with this _leech_, then I would _never _let you become one of _them_." She turned to leave, but Bella stopped her.

"Janessa, I know that you're beyond furious with me about everything I've done since I came here—putting Edward in danger, leaving him, almost killing myself and Edward, coming back to Forks, accepting his proposal and agreeing to change him—and there's plenty you want to say to me, but I'd like to say something to you if that's alright. Thank you for keeping Edward alive when I didn't."

"I didn't do it for _you,_" Janessa snarled. "I did it for _him_. And no, you _didn't _keep him alive. You claimed you were _protecting _him when you left, when in fact, you broke him and nearly _killed_ him!"

"I know. And I wish I could take it back, but I can't. But nevertheless, I'm grateful for what you did," said Bella. "But now you know that I'm here now and I'm _not_ going to leave his side until he orders me away."

Janessa glared at her. "Just take care of him this time. Or I swear, treaty or no, if he's _ever_ hurt again by your hand or any of your kind, I'll hunt you down and I'll make you wish the Volturi had taken care of you themselves, bloodsucker." She was about to run off, but I stopped her.

"Janessa, wait!" I said. She stopped and looked at me. "I know I hurt you and I'm so sorry. I never meant to. You're my best friend. Please. Come to my wedding. I'd be honored if you were there."

"My family wouldn't mind if you came as Edward's guest," said Bella.

Tears glistened in Janessa's eyes as she paused for a moment and then said, "I don't know if I can go to your wedding. Not because of my personal feelings for you, because of something else."

"And what's that?" I asked.

"The pack—and Sam especially—is already displeased with me for persuading them to let your plans even happen. I'll have to consider your request with them. But I can't promise you anything, Edward. I just can't."

"I understand," I said, nodding. "Call me if things change."

She nodded and was about to leave, but then she ran into my arms and she hugged me tightly once more before turning into her wolf form and running off into the forest, howling in grief. I didn't know what to do. I felt horrible for hurting her, however unintentionally, but I loved Bella. My heart was hers.

Bella just slipped her cold hand into my warm one and I squeezed it before taking her into my arms and kissing her. Everything was going to be okay and work out somehow. Whatever happened in the future, Bella and I would face it together and nothing would stop us at all.


End file.
